Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
