I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize