i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Randomize
