Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
