It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
