3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
