Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
sick fucks of a feather flock together
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize