I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
