i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
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