how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
