Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
