Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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