you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize