and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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