I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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