How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I love having hate sex.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Randomize
