I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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