How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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