if only i could text you this smell
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
