then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize