How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
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