Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Randomize
