No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I still have a little drunk in my system
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Randomize
