3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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