I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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