Dignity is for republicans.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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