Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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