she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I think a kid would responsible me up
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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