Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
