i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
