Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
