I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize