How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize