My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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