True but thats because hes a fetus.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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