That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I'm passing your future prison.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Blood and glitter go together right?
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
