I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
