All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
