Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
The uberlube is also flammable
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize
