Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Randomize
