shes about as inviting as chlamydia
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
