Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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