Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Randomize
