How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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