the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
