its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
