In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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