i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
