But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
