Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
