Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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